Me, Me, Me.

Selfishness. One of the worst and best attributes to have in life.
Why selfishness is perceived to be awful is understandable. Whether it’s that you don’t share anything with anyone, or you want everything to yourself for you to have; it does sound horrid, almost like you wouldn’t be someone people would want to be around.

But at the same time, isn’t selfishness what keeps us healthy? I mean, where would we be if we never thought about our own selves? What condition would we be in if we were always thinking about others and their needs, and never about our own?
When we’re babies, we learn that we must think about other’s feelings. We should be “understanding” and “open minded”, and we should you know, share our toys, and not eat paste.
But what they left out in this lesson was that sometimes we actually hurt ourselves by not being selfish enough. By not listening to our needs and focusing so much on someone else’s, we could be ignoring our own feelings that really need to be heard for our own good.

I personally think it’s very strong of a person to be able to step back and look at what is good for them; not just wonder what is good for everyone else just because it’s “convenient” or just because they don’t want to “hurt” anyone. To be able to look at yourself and your needs is a very powerful action. And it means that you have enough respect and love for yourself to do so.
For example most people who are in abusive relationships and keep going back to their abusive spouses, people whose friends only put them down, people who let others talk to them however they feel; those are people who don’t have enough love for themselves to be a little selfish.

To just say “alright now what’s good for me, because I’m awesome and deserve the best” shows very strong character and judgment. Not to mention loads of confidence. And those people probably go further in life than most.
But yes darlings, it is impossible to be healthily selfish if you do not like yourself. And that’s…well…because you subconsciously set yourself up for disaster in attempt to punish yourself for being so “horrible” as you would put it in your own mind. Yep, and that’s all subconscious.

I like to study the human mind.

But that’s a whole other blog.

Of course listening to others is extremely important as well, I cannot stress that enough. Thinking of only yourself is the most horrible thing you can do. One needs to accept that there are many other people in this world and their needs are significant also. Besides, thinking that way is just a setup for loneliness and despair.

But back to my point.

We need to be selfish sometimes. It’s why we pay for doctor’s visits, why we do well in school; because we want to take care of ourselves, we care about our own lives.
Why people say it’s wrong when we do it in our everyday lives, astounds me. And they only really tell you that you’re being selfish when they want their feelings to be heard.

Yep, we all do it.

So as weird as it sounds…selfishness kind of makes the world go round.